“Candle of my dreams, my little treasure. What has come of you?”
The ghastly stares were unforgiving. It was a common occurrence that had slowly metamorphosed into a norm. In these streets, you attract but for different reasons. You always had to walk like a thief in broad daylight. And sometimes, the tourists attracted more attention than the toured places. If you managed to get home without the feeling of guilt, then you would as well be crowned a hero or man/woman of the year. They smelled different and looked different too. Arctics of modernization manifested in that part of the world. The maze of technology and order was nothing less worth fathoming. Nevertheless, the sun had to set in the west.
Kanja had stayed in the foreign land for almost a year. Despite the rapid change in place and people, he stayed focused and worked so hard to camouflage. But how would that be possible when his skin tone alone would always sell him out? He came from a different part of the world and his current location equally showed and kept reminding him that he indeed was away – miles away from his ancestors and the air he would breathe and feel at ease.
“It feels different. This place is good but it fails to bring peace and homeliness” Kanja thought. As he walked down the streets, he could not imagine how the vegetation and humans were able to smartly coexist without conflict. “Children would be stoning these mangoes I swear. Or at least cowed might have mauled all the branches to sticks” A string of imaginations ran his mind. He imaged the kind of life and city he had left behind. The numerous rowdy street urchins punctuated several streets some of which were demarcated as resting places. In his hometown, resting was as good as ‘chilling.’ But this was a new land.
“I feel so empty now. I am so done and wish I would fly home” he thought. He had spent months away. Regardless of the modernization, he still believed that he lacked something. The emptiness and gap that was within. He pictured Njeri, a girl he had been madly in love with. “Huh, is she only knew how I feel about her! But women! Phew … cousins of Jezebel.” He remembered how terrible he had been heartbroken months after leaving home. The relationship that had appeared surreal came to a crumbling end months after his departure. Marked by insecurities and distance Njeri could not hold and withstand the loneliness. She decided to call the relationship off and perhaps move on with her life. The imagination alone drove Kanja insane. He, however, kept convincing himself and hoping that he would find her and make things work.
The street was long and dotted with several trees and people. Each passing bus punctuated the abnormal evening. Things had drastically changed over the months that he had spent in the strange little town, a town that had made him even more of a stranger. He remembered Njeri’s words ‘Kanja, I cannot do this anymore. It would be in our best interests if we stopped talking.’ She had emphasized unapologetically. The genesis of the argument had been warranted. But Kanja never imagined that the events would unfold in such an unforgiving manner. At least not when he was miles away in an unknown land.
Kanja beseeched Njeri, wondering what medicine would cure his current predicament. “Nkairetu,” he whispered on the phone, almost tearing up. “Candle of my dreams, my little treasure. What has come of you?” Kanja’s voice was stammering. He could not even hear himself. Njeri’s words cut through him like a hot knife in butter. Sweet memories of great evenings they had spent together on the shores of Diani and early days of nothingness where they toured Pirates Beach worsened his entire being. Vivid memories of them playing with the sand and throwing cowrie shells at each other in the late evening sun rushed back. A hot tear found its way down his left eye. “It is not happening!”
“Yes, I would appreciate it if you no longer disturb my phone,” Njeri affirmed. “Let us assume we never met. Let this be the last call because I already decided.” These were the last words before the phone hung up. Confused, Kanja was brought to reality by the incessant hooting from cars on the road. Apparently, the lights had long turned red. The sun had weaned and the beautiful evening had long been covered by the night. How unfortunate that the evening did not even have stars to calm him down. He had to rush and free up the traffic. A hand quickly grabbed him to the pavement.
They spoke words he could not understand. But so, kind were the traffic policemen that they dropped him home. But at least, for them, they had the courtesy of wishing him goodbye.
Months passed, with little help and support from a few friends. Kanja felt bitter. On several occasions, he rang his childhood friend Ottis. The brotherly consolation was worth applauding. His newly made friends Bosco and Tao equally helped dilute the pain. But this is love. “The moment you realize that you are heading in the wrong direction, stop immediately and start going back,” Hidi, one of his newly met friends had once joked. “Perhaps it is time to heed to this one,” Kanja thought. Not until news came in…
...continues